When You Don't Feel the Holiday Cheer
It’s ironic how holidays can bring out emotional pain in a way no other time of the year can. During the holidays we’re expected to be cheerful, generous, outgoing, and carefree. But for those of us experiencing economic or personal difficulties, the high expectations of the holiday season can serve as a bold reminder of how difficult things have been. And when we compare ourselves against the happy people we see on TV, we can see how far we come up short. To make things even harder, we often find ourselves spending time with people we perhaps would like to avoid. We may feel compelled to cook, clean, and shop for gifts when we really would prefer a vacation from daily life. No wonder we can feel like Scrooge. So what should we do?
First, here are some don’ts:
• Don’t automatically say yes to holiday invitations and requests. Limit your participation to activities that really mean something to you.
• Avoid being around difficult people to the extent possible.
• Try not to overdrink, overeat, or overwork.
• Don’t spend more money than you’re comfortable with.
Now, here’s what to do:
• Slow down! Take time to look around you and let in some of the fun of the season.
• Spend time with people you really enjoy and with whom you share common values.
• Buy smaller gifts or give time instead of money. Feel good about not going into debt.
• Put yourself in the holiday equation by doing something nice for yourself.
• Ask for help or support from others when you need it. Give them the gift of knowing their help makes a difference to you.
Talk to someone who can help! Find a licensed psychologist near you, use PPA's Psychologist Locator at www.papsy.org/locator. For information on other mental health topics, go to www.papsy.org, Resources, and then Public Resources. PPA offers these articles for informational purposes only; they are not a substitute for professional diagnosis or treatment.